I was reaching for my phone and scrolling social media at all hours of the day: when I woke up, when I went to bed, when I was in the bathroom, when I was riding in a car, when I was watching a movie… though, to be specific, it wasn’t as much checking my phone as it was checking Facebook. Facebook is the worst social media app for me. Once I pick up my phone, I find myself checking in to see what’s going on, and soon I am clicking on groups I don’t belong to, or clicking on ads, or just flitting around the media world, but not really noticing any one thing. I am convinced it’s bad for my focus and my memory.
It turns out, I’m not the only person thinking this way. I saw a recent article in the newspaper about focus and social media, and I happened upon the last half of this podcast about the harm from phone addiction, and how to address it: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/1119-the-middle-with-jeremy-ho-102531530/episode/are-you-addicted-to-your-phone-251920689/. Some of the solutions include ordering a special phone safe, so you can lock your phone away for designated periods of time. Or, adding apps that limit your access to other apps (like Facebook) for specified lengths of time—using your phone to address your addiction to your phone.
I am not jumping off Facebook at this time, because I find parts of it useful. Facebook is a very useful tool for my hobbies. I have learned a lot and enjoyed posts about upcycled fashion, horses and trail riding, fixing sewing machines, gardening, mushrooms… I’ve learned about self-publishing and chatted with authors around the world. I’ve seen what my friends are up to, but only the friends that are very active on social media. Because that’s how it works.
I’ve also wasted a lot of time looking at forwarded memes (and infrequently forwarding them myself) and laughing at Calvin and Hobbs or Far Side cartoons that I wouldn’t otherwise have looked for. Also frowning about political memes and stopping myself from commenting (usually) when I disagree. I don’t think commenting and arguing on social media changes anyone’s mind. It just stresses me out and saps my energy.
I will still use Facebook as a tool for sharing writing, or commenting to my friends, but I am cutting back. I am allowing myself some scrolling time in the morning and trying to avoid it for the rest of the day. I am leaving my phone out of reach, or in the other room. When I catch myself picking up my phone automatically, I allow myself to glance at whether I’ve received any text messages or missed a call from a friend, but then it goes back in my purse, or face down on the table, or in the other room—my version of a phone safe.
Instead of having my phone adjacent to me at all times, I have stashed books everywhere I can think of. There is a poetry book in each car, so that if I am waiting for an appointment, I can pick up the book instead of my phone. I have a non-fiction book next to my spot on the couch, and several on my bed-side table. I have a book of poems stashed in a drawer in the bathroom. With all of those stashed books, I find myself reading more, and scrolling less. I tend to read poetry and non-fiction books a page or a chapter at a time anyhow, so it’s working well. I’m also making a dent in my very large “to be read” pile.
Since starting this new effort, I have sometimes been a little slower to respond to my friends’ messages. As my phone is no longer a constant companion, I might miss some last-minute invitations. And I might miss some personal updates from friends that share on social media. I’ve also caught myself going backwards, and scrolling more, especially over the Christmas holiday. But I am intent on improving my ability to let go of my phone for long durations and allowing my brain to focus on other enjoyable things. I already feel less stressed. Plus, I’m getting lots of reading in.
[Photo credit: Pexels Free Photos]
Michelle Eames 