Month: July 2025

Milkshakes

It may have been a mistake that day I stopped at the Zips Drive-In in Nine Mile Falls and ordered a chocolate milkshake.  I knew the Zips was there, at the half-way point of my drive home from riding my horse. I’ve noticed that drive-in across the busy highway intersection and realized it would often be easier to take a right and then “zip” into the parking lot and loop around, rather than to wait for an opening for a left turn.  But I was avoiding that extra-efficient jaunt, to avoid remembering how good a chocolate milkshake can be.

You see, I’m an expert on milkshakes.  When I was working, I would drive to various meetings across the vast expanse of Eastern Washington.  These were day trips, driving up to three hours, attending a meeting or a field trip, and then driving home.  They were very long days, often requiring road food.  And milkshakes were a perfect road food.  They didn’t drop crumbs in the car, the cups were easy to hold while driving, and the straw allowed me to keep my eyes on the road while ingesting the necessary sugar and chocolate to keep me awake.  And it’s a dairy product, so it’s good for me!  It was also a bonus that drive-ins usually had bathrooms. 

During those drives, I decided to rate the chocolate shakes at all of the drive-in restaurants along my routes.  I only rated old-school type drive-ins, the ones that have the windows that you walk up to, and a long menu of comfort foods, like French fries, onion rings with tartar sauce, fish and chips, and deluxe cheeseburgers.   I did not rate the national chains, in part because they are boring, but also because their milkshakes tend to be icky.  The only exception to the chain rule was Zips because it was a local chain and their milkshakes were definitely not icky.

I kept a notebook for the milkshake ratings, with a scale of 1 to 5.  I rated thickness: Does the straw stand up on it’s own? Are you likely to pop a blood vessel in your eye from sucking too hard?  I gave extra points if a spoon would have been helpful.  I rated technique: Did they use the old-school kind of milkshake makers, where they blend the syrup and ice cream in the serving cup? I rated sound effects: Does the straw make obnoxious sounds as you get to the bottom of the shake and try to suck up the final clumps? Do you have to say “excuse me” to any passengers in the car?  And of course taste: Is the chocolate flavor strong, and not overly sweet? I gave negative points if they added malt flavor to the chocolate shake.  What is malt, anyways? Flavored chalk?

I envisioned writing up my survey results in a milkshake review booklet and sending it to the Washington Dairy Council, knowing they would buy it and give me lots of money for my genius marketing idea.  Except I never finished the manuscript to send it in. Then I lost my rating notebook.   Nonetheless, I did manage to find the best chocolate shake joints in Eastern Washington.  I also learned the gas stations that sold home-made cookies, and the coffee stands that sold espresso shakes (a close second to chocolate shakes with an extra caffeine boost).  Eventually, as I got older, I had to start watching my calories and stopped drinking milkshakes.  And over time some of the best milkshake locations, including my number one rated spot, closed down. It was right off Interstate 90, near Moses Lake.  The second-best milkshake location in my survey still exists, though: Billy Burgers in Wilbur, Washington.  I guess that moves them up to first place.   Congratulations, Billy Burgers!

That day I stopped at the Zips in Nine-Mile Falls was a hot one, I was tired, a bit hungry, and needed a pick-me up.  I turned right at the busy intersection, left into the parking lot, and pulled up to the drive-through lane.  They offered choices of milk shake sizes and many flavors, though of course I went with chocolate.  That first suck of the straw required a super-human effort.  Thickness points 5.  Could use a spoon.  Taste 5.  It was a very good milkshake. The problem is now I remember how good their shakes are, and that drive-in is in a very convenient location.  

I had to go back one more time, because I neglected to get a picture the first time.  The chocolate shake was still good on the second visit.  Will I now need a milkshake every hot day on my drive home from riding?  After all, the world is a chaotic and worrisome place, and I need to find moments of joy.  A chocolate shake is joy in a cup.  Unless it’s chocolate malt.      

How Long Does It Take for a Cat to Barf After Eating a Chipmunk?

I love our chipmunks, and I saw some cavorting in a Serviceberry bush yesterday evening as I was bird watching. I was so happy the cats were indoors, or in their small catio, and the birds were all safe in my yard. 

Apparently the chipmunks were not safe, however, as this morning my husband saw Purrcy run through the living room with a chipmunk in his mouth.  He yelled, “Where was the cat? He has a chipmunk!” as Purrcy ran upstairs past me and into my son’s room.  My son’s room is not a neat and tidy place.  There are many spots to hide, I realized, as I grabbed the cat with the small live mammal in his mouth, and he dropped it.  The chippy disappeared under the desk as I hurriedly put the cat out on the porch, and joined Doug in my son’s room.  His hands were on his hips and he was frowning, with no chippy in sight.  It had to be there somewhere.

We discussed a trap. But I don’t have a chipmunk-sized live trap.  I grabbed a couple of mixing bowls from the kitchen thinking we might capture him under one… and then, um, maybe slip a piece of cardboard under it, like capturing a house spider under a glass to free it outside…? Yeah, surely that would work.  But the chippy was nowhere in sight. 

So Doug let the cat back in the room to capture the chipmunk. Purrcy had it caught before I had time to think through how we might get the chippy out of his mouth without it escaping again.  Put the mixing bowl over the cat? Purrcy zipped out of the room, chimpmunk hanging from his mouth, past us, downstairs, and crashed through the swinging catio door.  We ran after him, closed the inner catio door, and then ran out our back door and around to the other side of the house to the catio with hopes of getting the cat to release the chippy.  Even before I had the outer catio door unlatched Purrcy had eaten the chippy’s head off.  We left him to devour the rest of the body.  

I love our chipmunks.  But this was definitely a survival of the fittest scenario.  That chipmunk obliviously entered a small fenced area that was full of cat-predator smell.  Of course it got eaten (after being traumatized by the cat and two humans).  As Doug says, even a blind squirrel will eventually find a nut.  Even a caged cat will eventually find some prey. 

At least it wasn’t a bird loose in the house.  This time, anyhow.

P.S.  At the time of this writing, it’s 24 hours later and I still haven’t found any cat puke.  That either means it’s not going to happen, or that Purrcy has already made his deposit in some dark and hidden location that I will only find when I step in it, barefoot, in the middle of the night.

[Photo Credit Openverse]